Whether it’s in the whir of rushing through a crowd of people or it’s in the quiet hum of my own thoughts before I fall asleep at night, there are still times when I get the best of myself – when my mind runs down dark paths of loneliness, doubt, and self-destruction. I wonder if my thoughts are right and if there is a truth to them. It’s the haunting reality that I’m not enough. I’m not pretty enough. I’m not skinny enough. I don’t work hard enough. That even with my best efforts, they aren’t good enough. That even at the best version of myself it’s still not good enough. And, yes, there is some truth to that. I will never be perfect. Knowing that isn’t the hard part. The hard part is still believing that I can get as close to perfect as possible and being disappointed in myself when I still fall short. This cycle leads me to devaluing myself. It’s not just with my own thoughts, but the ghosts from my past whose whispers still glide past my ears reminding me of their words that made me feel so insecure and sensitive to who I am both inside and out in the first place.
But I’m not the only one. There has to be someone else out there who feels the same way, who fights with her thoughts, and struggles with her self-worth, insecurities, and confidence
- About 20% of teens will experience depression before they reach adulthood.
- Over 70% of girls age 15 to 17 avoid normal daily activities, such as attending school, when they feel bad about their looks.
- 7 in 10 girls believe that they are not good enough or don’t measure up in some way, including their looks, performance in school and relationships with friends and family members.
Not only am I not the only one, but these feelings and thought process start at a young age. Devaluing one’s self and one’s life can, at an extreme, result in suicide which is the second leading cause of death from 10-24 year olds.
Regardless of your choices, ethnicity, weight, height, success, or even how YOU think or perceive yourself, let me tell you something …
Everyone at one point or another in their life struggles with insecurities, their self-worth, and confidence. That means you’re not alone in this fight. I’m not alone in this fight. But it also means that this is a fight worth battling because if so many people are going through it then we need to find a way to be victorious.
These truths aren’t just ones I have to accept, but ones I HAVE to believe in completely. Someone can tell you something and you can agree with what they have to say, but if you don’t truly believe it then you aren’t going to allow it motivate you to make a change. These are truths that anyone who struggles with self-worth need to not just agree with or accept, but truly believe in order to be victorious in this battle.
I am not perfect and never will be perfect, but my level of perfection is not equivalent to my value. I know this is true because of truth #2.
“For there is a root of sinful self-interest in us that is at odds with a free spirit, just as the free spirit is incompatible with selfishness. These two ways of life are antithetical, so that you cannot live at times one way and at times another way according to how you feel on any given day.”
There is no perfection in humanity which is why it took a man who was 100% human and 100% God and in His sinless and perfect nature was able to take my penalty of death upon himself and give me a life of freedom and redemption. If I were valueless, why would such a man choose to go through unimaginable pain, agony, and eventually die for me? His death gives me value.
And we know that all things work together for good to them that love God, to them who are the called according to [his] purpose.
- Romans 8:28
My value is immeasurable as a result of Christ’s act of love. His love was the adoption seal that made me a daughter of the Most High King. By default I’m not just royalty, but a Princess. A Princess’ value is immeasurable.
“I will be a Father to you,
And you shall be My sons and daughters,
Says the Lord Almighty.”
-2 Corinthians 6:18
I can never be too beautiful or too ugly, too skinny or too fat, too rich or too poor for God because regardless of my imperfection I AM enough. His love is unconditional and His love gives me value.
“Do you think anyone is going to be able to drive a wedge between us and Christ’s love for us? There is no way! Not trouble, not hard times, not hatred, not hunger, not homelessness, not bullying threats, not backstabbing, not even the worst sins listed in Scripture:”
And even though my beauty does not give me value I can be confident in knowing that I am the most beautiful creature on earth because I am fearfully and wonderfully made in God’s image who has defined beauty Himself.
“I thank you, High God – you’re breathtaking! Body and soul, I am marvelously made! I worship in adoration – what a creation!”
These truths have helped me to realize that my value is not found in my perception of what my value is or even in what other people’s perception of what my value is. My value is based on the truth of Christ. If that weren’t true, I would have no real value, but He is the reason this battle, I personally face and our society faces, can be won and why we can have victory to take back our confidence, laugh at our insecurities, and once and for all embrace our true value. I hope this can be an encouragement to you today. What ways do you overcome your insecurities? What are the truths you believe and live by?